In a completely foreseen step, following on from the intended reintroduction of fox hunting to the UK leisure industry, Conservatives will be passing legislation that will see underage workers once again forced to climb up the inside of the chimneys of the rich and privileged. There is also a plan to make these children sleep in them overnight, so as to reduce the unsightly road fatalities caused by these exhausted minors as they trudge back to their slums after a day at work.
We interviewed an urchin, who seemed entirely happy with this arrangement. Speaking at a press conference, one Jack T. Ladd of London Town, said, 'Bloomin' 'ell, at least if I'm up a chimney, I won't be out nicking trainers, sniffing glue, shootin' at coppers or goin' to university and learning about social injustice and getting my degree and then causing a peasant's uprising.'
Below: A Chimney Sweep.
Seen yesterday: A Conservative.
